Do not blame me for it hurts , it was right what you said and I was ashamed

Taking that blame so far thinking it is going to be good and praised

Sympathy is what I needs for my heart is torn and scared

I farewell a queen that ruled not only my heart but also my soul I am afraid

I wished then that I was a stone and my soul was slaughtered with a blade

My brain bled when her eyes leaked as we hugged like sides of spades

I wished not but she drew a line that only God can cross or re state

Patience is merely a cobbled dress that I wear.. upgrade.. but does not aid

I pegged my eyes .. stop pouring or your sight will surely fade

What good is a sight if she’s not .. life then is just one big charade

I run out of excuses so reality answered it is your mistake.. big as a glade

I was granted to rule in her kingdom, and now banned and strayed

Who betrays the virtue of love, life and joy betrays back and raid

I made the bitter potion of longing .. only to drink, cry and fade

They tell me she broke it.. I say I ruined it .. and she was staid

I never thought this day will come.. but I called for it when that mistake was made

I wish I was drugged I wish I was drunk yet I was sober but drained

I wish my Queen was not human for only then she would believe it was decayed

My side never tasted a sight like when beside her on the bed of escapades

I would grant my life for a moment.. back when I was the king of the parade

I would grant my life to go back and travel, crawling to her even on sharp blade

I would grant my life to go back and kill that stupid demon and persuade

God, I beg forgiveness I beg sanity I beg patience and I wish I was prepared

I jumped into a well , that i was hoping to have a  bottom to hit and fade

Instead I am still falling to an endless agony hoping to end if I prayed

I would wait till patience is redefined or death visit me or I get betrayed

Betrayed by death if she goes before me for I die every second made

Aging while hanging onto a straw drowning in her eye and her shade

I whispered to the sky to rain to be touched by the same rain I portrayed

I dream of a dream where I stand before her throne with a trade

Take my soul for one night with you , and that is a fair trade

If you don’t then know this… I would never give up even my soul get abrade

I pray for you with every breath… for my last would have your name arrayed

 

If I could ask the sun how many faces it can see, if I could ask the moon how many drops in the sea, if I could ask the wind how many towns it went through, if I could only ask the rain how many places got wet too… With all theses faces and all these smiles I could see only one face from thousands of miles, a face so bright like a rainbow in a night, a face so distinct, even more than a fingerprint. It appeared among a very busy crowd yet so fine and proud. “I don’t have this grace, I wonder how such look got that pace” heaven said. It freezes blood in any vein but this is not the only gain…  It stops time, and heals the pain even the sun could not melt that strain. I told heaven, earth, moon and the sun also dropped its ear so soon.. I know this face.. stop all these charades.. This face is real, its a whole, its a feel. It starts with play and ends with a sway.. I am sorry but I am not giving the name away. Now I know why the sun sets and the moon glow, its when her eyes close and her face show, so next time there is an eclipse, I will ask her to smile and ease those lips.

I find psychology particularly interesting; I believe it is one of the most important science known to man, for man. I can bet you that if you ask most people about their “one wish”, it would always lead to one thing… happiness!

Psychologists are experts in happiness. Like most scientists, they tend to invent theories and difficult terms to make the matter more “academic”. However, if this would lead to man’s one wish, I believe it’s worth exploring. They categorize happiness into “life satisfaction”, which is the overall assessment of feelings and attitudes at a particular time, and “subjective wellbeing”, which is the snapshot of your happiness at the moment. They are dedicated to fixing you if you are not able happy, through therapies and medication: they run electricity into the body, apply a magnetic field on the brain, or a combination of these; they do miracles of modern science to kill the sadness within.

Happiness is one of those things that people feel deeply about, and each individual would have their own thoughts, interpretation and philosophies. A survey showed that people over the age of 60 have higher level of life satisfaction than of those in their 40s, and naturally, subjective wellbeing is higher among youths than others. However, what is puzzling is how they conclude such results without a clear definition of happiness! They described different states of happiness… this is like saying that water is liquid and sometimes it becomes ice – solid! It gets worse when they analyze or further define happiness as chemical reactions in the brain! Is that it? Our “one wish”, all we are hoping for, meditations, massages, music, relationships, marriage, kids, and enduring all the hardships and agony just to make the environment in our body conducive to ignite this chemical reaction so we feel happy? Who is happier to you – a person who could take a deep “baby” nap in the middle of a construction site, or the sleepless one in a palace? A person who is laughing with his 12 kids not knowing if he can feed them tomorrow, or the someone who can’t have quality time with his only kid?

Let’s look at this from a different angle: depression pills are prescribed to lift the mood and to enhance the subjective well being… they do that by stimulating the same chemical reaction in the brain. So, would you regard this as fake happiness? It is the same person with the same brain, but a different simulator, but does it make it unreal? I would bet that both yes and no answers to this question lead to the conclusion that that happiness is fake! We normally accept masquerading the truth by fancy interpretation such as “Well, this is subjective”. Are we seriously “wasting” our energy and precious time chasing a “kick” that can be attained by a pill or a joint? You could argue that happiness is not momentary… it is experience, surroundings, environment and interaction. However, to others, it might mean being alone listening to music, not caring about tomorrow. Here is where the subjectivity kicks in, and both will not feel happy till the chemicals kicks in. To cut the long story short, I feel more like we are living in the “matrix”, except that in the matrix, we are controlled by a computer program and machine code, and here, by chemistry.

I am not suggesting that illegal drugs be legalized, or that one be on depression pills or get high whenever a tragedy or hardship strikes… absolutely not! I am just trying to analyze happiness down to a science by attempting to identify the basic anatomy of it; so then we might discover that it is not our “one wish” after all, or another set of chemicals in our brain would have much better “feeling” than happiness is yet to be discovered.

The United Nations declared March 20th as the “International Day of Happiness” and Dubai recently appointed a Happiness Minister in their government. The whole world is acknowledging the importance of well-being, but is this a phantom? Is it a tool to achieve the economical paradox “keep them unhappy” to “sell” happiness? Next time I laugh, I will try to ease my mind and let chemistry do its magic, since I desperately need this to be real; or can it be?

They say if insects were to vanish from the face of the earth, the planet will die in 30 years, ­but if humans vanish, the earth will flourish within 10 years!

Many would attribute such occurrence to man’s uncontrolled consumption of resources, overpopulation, education, technology and so on. However, I personally see this as an alarming indication that there is more to life than being human.

We always brag about our brain and its abilities, trying to discover its ingenious dimension. Not to mention the theories about how we barely use merely 5% of its capacity and how we can break the rules of physics, if we were to consume 20% to 30% of its capacity. Scientists are still puzzled how Einstein could come up with his theories using a human brain just like you and me. So they dug into his skull hoping to find an alien substance or life form sourcing such intelligence. Naturally they were disappointed and claimed that his brain had more curves. For every obstacle, dilemma, or a problem, the accepted approach (of the elite) would be a rational approach. One would be praised and cheered if they think outside the box, which means that they are accessing an area of one’s intellect that most people use for silly things such as picking their nose or scratching their feet. So with all these brain abilities superior to that of most other beings, we still are not able to control and maintain our life dependency, our inhabitance, and our own survival.

I believe many would agree that if humans seize to exist, the other brainless beings would not have problems such as overpopulation or resource management. Ironically most scientists would like to think that most beings (other than humans) have a phenomenal level of intelligence expressed by their behavior. So, what part of the philosophy of life of animals do we not understand? What part of bee¡¯s determination to fly that we do not understand? What part of ant¡¯s community structure that we do not understand? What part of animal¡¯s nesting that we do not understand?

Is the problem that we are not using our brain¡¯s full capacity? Or rather using too much of it!? Or maybe animals are superior beings in terms of living! I am not suggesting leaving the city and living in the woods or desert, I am not saying to abandon modernization, I am just trying to think simple about the root cause of human suffering.  If you ask most people about their suffering you would always get one answer in one form or another ¡°It¡¯s complicated¡±!!!!…  why should it be complicated?  Well¡­  Mainly because humans by nature like borders, limits, bars, fences, secret paths, guards, mazes, darkness, deserts, daemons and they name them things such as culture, civilization, law, religion, norms, social rank, racism etc. therefore people normally spend most of their time understanding these borders and try to cross deserts and oceans  just to reach to the core reason of their problem to solve it, yet sadly most people do not reach, so they keep spinning around the border line trying to find a way to the problem rather than solving it.

NASA spent long time trying to invent a pin that would work in 0 gravity while Russians used pencils! , or that patient who used to point by his finger to different parts of his body and say ¡°it hurts here and there¡± after thorough examination they fixed the cut in his finger. What I am trying to say that lets ask the experts about life lets ask the beings that inhabited this earth way before humans and start to extinct shortly after we arrived, if they can bring life to earth at least 3 times faster than we can destroy it!!! Maybe we should think again who is who